BLACK STONE ON A WHITE STONE


after César Vallejo

I will die in Paris in the rain
on a day I already remember.
I will die in Paris – and won’t shy away –
perhaps on a Thursday, in November.

It will be Thursday, like today, the Thursday
I wrote these lines, bore the load
on these shoulders. Never has the pain
been so heavy, the sight of a road

so without hope. César Vallejo has died.
They beat him. Although he was innocent
of harming them, they twisted the knife,
they tightened the rope. And here are my witnesses:

the bones of my shoulders, the Thursdays
alone, the roads, the rain.

The Dissonance of Indifferance and Inequality (Sandokai in opposites)

The mind that runs through me is not great from ear to ear.
While my faculties have largely been sharp, I feel no link to my ancestors.
There have been moments of light, but always twilight, always the going down.
I am deluded and I grasp; I never wanted entitlement.
Of the 9 senses of my consciousness, nociception is the one.
It always speaks to me. We keep each other in place, painfully.
Proprioception feels things too much really, a problem of the body.
Eloquence is ugly. I often speak in morphemes to a dark wall,
for clarity I put my words into a waste disposal unit owned by Nestlé.
The forest burns the drowned child. The mother breathes the dustbowl;
mink cull, koala cuddle, sneezing panda, cruelty culture.
Derangement of the senses was somewhere to go;
thus with such stuff, always the battle to take root, to be rooted.
Our cousins the trees filter bison who scream about their problems.
We gave up on using light and/or darkness as kinds of metaphor.
I walk slowly into the dark, my fist pressed lightly against my heart, my feet
Pandora’s boxes of problems. I drink the earth. Knives fuck
when unused, just lie there listening and understanding nothing, without standards.
If we learn how to walk, will the path know where we’re coming from?
The new progress is to go inside the mountain and find a river without
harming anything. With respect, I think you are wasting your time.

When We Have No Money (Trad., After Lankum)

When we have no money when we have no
true lovers what will we do find something to grow
scrounge for tubers we can’t eat gold
we’re lend to each other we look after each
eating the gold we can learn
to eat whatever death they serve us
we are eating it and eating it now we
can’t get enough of them they can’t get
enough of us it’s symbiotic like Crimea like
importing food because it’s cheaper than growing it
like England in 1819 all over again
because they own the land and tell us what to
be in their land then close off the land
like throwing yourself from the tree repeatedly
from the tree of life because death
has been prorogued for the day
the bodies lie fallen the tree fallen the day confused at being alive
they go and question ask why aren’t you working o fucking eater of death.

What will we do when we have no language
true lovers what will we do I can safely say
I am working in the wrong medium that I am
the wrong medium there is some shame involved
and shame is what keeps us together
we cannot drink symbols nor will we ever
we have no use for symbols and we cannot
be around people though you are okay
I can safely say we will be busy when
there is no longer the bourgeois novel
please never write the bourgeois novel.

What will we do when we have no venues
at least not the old ones we bail out
the bankers but that’s as far as it goes
which is understandable bitter funeral beer
bitter biter your fucking hand in my
mouth man the concept of a gig
has been co-opted drink up.

What will we do when they
give back Patrice Lumumba’s tooth
they might have to re-think things
like a tooth is a tooth is a tooth is a tooth is a tooth like
an eye.

What will we do new precariat
pervasive insecure and dangerous class
grow industrial can you hear it shrinking
technological revolution is a monster and we
are unstable we are on-call we lack identity we are
not really counted are uncountable nouns
restraining an almost entirely volatile medical leave
entirely living on the edge of a meaningful
uninsurable uncertainty to keep it civil culturally
a leader spectrum all is not victim or failure
they are dangerous in a positive way and negative in
an atavistic way look there is bad news and bad news
I woke up one morning and I couldn’t believe how
precarious I was then I went on down the hall
inserted my finger into my father and
I am always surprised when I wake up in the morning
why you never remember the moment you fall asleep.

True lovers what will we do to take the slumlord millionaire
out of the credit trap it’s like taking a cancer cell out of
cancer malignant like driving your own hands into a monument
like sharpening your teeth on a wall like the preparation
of broken plates below a table then digging in it’s like
praying like telling a stranger what you think of
them like fracking your bathroom
like asscalling the enemy and as fun like the chicken’s head
in Haneke’s Caché decapitated safe in the knowledge
that no one expects you to prove who cut it off
that the decapitation is part of the whole
that you are alone in this true lovers alone.

I Know It’s Just Intonation But I Like It

We’re back worshipping the god of chaos
with arthritic fingers with rucksacks of oil
we’re off linear stories there will be no
50-word bio to explain our status anxiety
our broken promises our misfiring synapses
our fire forest our prize-giving our home-
making we’re back saying arm and a leg
we want no air of superiority as soon as
one shows off we drown in toxicity
as soon as one-upmanship we lay down on
moss first thing last thing o my days
remember often touch the moss
as quiet and as soft as you.

Peter Rehberg (1968-2021)

“Pita’s like getting your heart ripped out at the end of the world.

Breathtaking to an infinite power.”

from here.

I recall Pita telling the Wire to go fuck themselves. Something over advertising space. How much he had created and contributed. Right on, Pita. Met him before his set for the Mika memorial at Oto. Had an edge. Played one of the greatest eurorack sets I’ve heard. Like live from the centre of all electronic sets. Hellmouth of earthcentre chimes xen firework drops. Fuck death. Everyone’s inconsolable.

A Piece of Dirt in the Time-Court Mirage (CC Hennix vs. Bernhard Günter)

The Dopplereffekt going off was the
door alarm at Cleveland Street was martial
art was even less is not a piece of music
is
a piece of dirt in the snow how do you feel

it’s materialist but it’s conceptual
you have to endure the
brutal reality you know how you feel
he never even bought me a pint
and I was once dead who am now living.

So the time court community centre
the wash my face in the sink the space-
time collapser sine hall there is no where
we trained, you pass the addicts
on the way then down training
past the guilt voice confessor compactor and
we drown it has been x years since.

And I was once a beautiful boy. And we
were once a piece of meat-played-percussion

we knew nothing of
cities it is a pleasure to delete you

“my name is and I am a”
my-name-is-and-I-am-a
mynameisandIama

it’s been x since my last organism enzyme
chemical reactor extractor. Some
kind of addiction someone recover
Boots the Chemist methadone plastic cup container

so I crumpled the crude oil into what was the new
that which I cannot name branded supermarket
cannot the who owns England off-shore
when you admitted you can’t remember
what was there before it

there are no plans
to re-open the restaurant
atop
the post office tower and when you enter

on the way down

the addicts sit you wash your sink into the sweat their tea

you are straight outta Bloodline
into the 50 pence orange and children of Clapton
the fighting and sweating the guts
the advice to E5 would be the city is yours

im working in the wrong form man

youth was
we will die here
are the plastic

flexing into the hope of its becoming
oil again in the Chora(s)san Time-Court Mirage
in the community room and the shakes again
acid skin scare whirlpool

atomic whirlpool.

The Body in Pain (for the Victims)


Tonight, the valley lies sleeping.
The river bends around the hill
like a prisoner who mustn’t hide
his hands, who must sleep with his hands
out in the open. Everything can be known
in our age. Everyone is being watched.
The moon goes red. The stars hide in the earth.
*
So burrow into your skull. Burrow,
like a mole. This is all that is left for you,
to burrow for what is buried
to go on burrowing like a mole
for the stars in the earth.

*

Even fish dream.
*
Let this river be your goddess. This hill
your god. The body is as massive, is bigger.
The stars in their blindness cannot contain it.
That which knows you and knows
what it is to suffer
is as the eyelidless fish
under water dazzled awake.
Step out now from your body:
your garden, wood & wife
are waiting for you. So too
are the termites of the trees,
the woodlice and centipedes
under the bones of the earth.
Attendant insects will
bear your weight
on their backs.
*
Your body covers the desert,
suburb and its city.
*
Fold your hands inside your skull.
*
The river dreams with its hands out in the open.

All That She

After

This is a song about all it is a song about wants it is a song
about lonely it is a song about life it is a song about
tomorrow it is a song about gone it is a song about song
about leading about leads about leader what it is to lead about
she it is a song about baby it is a song about ay-eh-eh
it begins with morning light since that is how you begin a song and begin a life
and begin lonely and begin wants and begin baby and begin tomorrow
it begins by being lonely it begins she leads it begins with life
because what is bigger than life and as terrifying and the morning
light it begins she opened up and we are all opening up we open up we
are open to the beginning and the morning and open morning and the
open lonely life the open light the light open the morning begun we are the day had we are
the just we begin with the just we begin with the begun and are begun
and the song has begun and the day is just and it is just she who is the
light and the just life she leads and the eyes the thought the thought eyes
the oh the oh just the oh she oh oh oh in the oh not
it’s not not the morning it’s not not the day it’s not not the work just the
day just the catching the sun she the sun woke the sun lonely the lonely light
the light just the light work the not the day it’s not work it’s not sun it’s not
light it’s day a day for catching she for catching life for catching light for catching the
catching all for catching all that for catching all that laying a lonely beach a
life a light a lonely late all day all lonely laying fun a woke beach a woke laying all
eyes all work all morning all laying all beach all having all fun it’s fun it’s lonely fun
it’s fun life it’s life going it’s she going it’s going to get you going it’s having beach it’s
having lonely life fun it’s wants it’s another fun it’s another light fun life baby gone boy
gone life gone lonely fun baby gone woke baby light boy begun thought baby
boy baby about all about wants about she about another about baby about tomorrow gone
about so about if it’s not so it’s not if it’s not light it’s not baby it’s not another it’s not about
wants it’s not about a hunter about a fox it’s not fox it’s not baby and the hunter it’s
about right about gentle about voice about the lonely talks the lonely won’t talk
the forever won’t it’s begun forever has begun it won’t talk forever won’t talk baby is another
passion the boy is tomorrow the boy is gone forever is gone is gentle forever is
another wants it’s not a hunter it’s not a fox it’s not the gentle voice it is flashing in her eyes
it is another lonely life is is life it it lonely is going it is going it is baby baby another baby
forever forever all forever another another forever another all another she
about a minor key about a darker sound begun a greater level begun a sadness
all that she increased relatable about tape stuck in his car all that she over and
over about dark fusion begun trademark begun dub-reggae because the woman
is not whole all that she whole all that she forever about always leaving about
another woman about another mother about another another it’s not begun it’s
had been it’s forever been it’s forever it’s touch
she it’s touch our land it’s begun regret it’s all regret it’s closed that book it’s I don’t
even it’s tomorrow learned it’s tomorrow lonely it’s tomorrow somebody it’s time
begun time it’s learned from it it’s life that is me it’s somebody it’s she it’s baby
it’s boy it’s wants it’s all it’s begun it’s teamed with wants it’s
working with all it’s teamed with forever it’s o what a morning
about a begun life business wants get going not going get
all hunter right sight baby passion night forever boy lonely beach fun work thought
laying goodbye to another tomorrow forever that she all oh opened oh she eyes ay-eh-eh